Should a Therapist Be a Blank Slate?

On politics, personal values and being human in the therapy room.

Should therapists share their personal beliefs? Should we express political opinions publicly? And does being a therapist mean we should keep our views to ourselves?

I've been thinking about these questions recently after sharing my political views on social media during the Brazilian presidential election.

It made me reflect on the expectation that therapists should remain neutral or reveal very little about themselves. But is that really possible? And perhaps more importantly, is it always helpful?

Where does the idea of the blank slate come from?

If we go back to the early days of psychoanalysis, Freud encouraged therapists to maintain a certain degree of neutrality and anonymity.

The idea was that by revealing little about themselves, therapists could create space for clients to explore their own thoughts, feelings and unconscious processes.

In psychodynamic therapy, processes such as transference and countertransference are particularly important.

Transference involves clients unconsciously bringing feelings or expectations from previous relationships into their relationship with the therapist. Countertransference refers to the therapist's emotional responses to the client.

Limiting personal disclosure can help therapists explore these processes without introducing unnecessary information about themselves.

There is value in this approach and contemporary psychodynamic therapy has developed considerably since Freud. Many psychodynamic therapists today work in a warm and relational way.

But neutrality doesn't necessarily mean being distant or impersonal. And being authentic doesn't mean sharing everything.

The therapist as a real person

One of the therapists whose work I particularly connect with is Irvin Yalom.

I love his writing and the way he talks about therapy. There is something wonderfully human about his approach.

Yalom describes therapists and clients as fellow travellers. Two people who share the experience of being human, with all the uncertainty, vulnerability and difficulties that come with it.

Of course, they have different roles and responsibilities. But neither is somehow above the struggles of ordinary life.

What I particularly appreciate about Yalom is his willingness to acknowledge his own humanity. He writes openly about his experiences, mistakes and feelings. He doesn't present himself as someone who has all the answers simply because he is a therapist.

And I find that refreshing.

Carl Rogers also emphasised the importance of congruence or genuineness within the therapeutic relationship. The idea that therapists should be real rather than hide behind a professional façade.

These ideas have influenced how I approach my own work.

I believe the relationship between therapist and client matters enormously. And I think the person behind the therapist is part of that relationship.

But there is an important distinction here. Yalom's ideas about authenticity and self-disclosure within therapy don't automatically answer the question of what therapists should share publicly.

That's a different conversation and one that deserves some thought.

I am not and will never be a blank slate

People choose therapists for different reasons. Qualifications and experience matter but so does the way we relate to others.

My approach is relational, warm, down-to-earth and open. I like humour and I'm happy to gently challenge clients when I think it might be helpful.

I don't believe being professional means having to hide my personality.

I'm also a woman of colour, an immigrant, Brazilian, bisexual and a feminist. These are just some of the many things that make me who I am.

I believe in women's rights and bodily autonomy. I support LGBTQ+ rights, racial equality and the freedom to live without discrimination.

As a psychosexual and relationship therapist, I believe in consent, sexual freedom and the right to explore our identities and relationships without shame.

These are part of who I am. They shape how I understand the world and inevitably influence the perspective I bring to my work.

Of course, being aware of our values is important precisely because they can influence us. We need to recognise our own assumptions and be willing to question them.

But I don't think pretending we have no values makes us better therapists.

So why am I talking about politics?

Anyone who follows me on social media will know that I have a rather complicated relationship with it. Actually, considering how little I post, you might think I don't have a relationship with it at all!

I have good intentions. I think about posting something and then weeks go by. Sometimes months.

But recently I shared a photograph of myself in London after voting in the Brazilian presidential election. I also made my political preference clear.

And afterwards I found myself thinking about whether therapists should do that.

There is something strange about voting in London for the future of a country I no longer live in.

I leave the polling station and return to my everyday life in the UK. Meanwhile, my family and so many people I love will live with the consequences of that election.

Brazil is my home country.

I haven't lived there for many years but it is still home in so many ways. It's where I grew up and where so much of who I am comes from and I worry about its future.

Brazil has experienced significant political polarisation and the growing influence of far-right movements. We've seen similar developments in the UK, the US and other parts of the world.

What concerns me most is the rhetoric and positions promoted by some of these movements. The misogyny. The racism. The homophobia. The attacks on women's rights and LGBTQ+ communities.

And in Brazil, something I find particularly frightening is the way some figures on the far right have openly defended or glorified the military dictatorship that ruled the country from 1964 to 1985.

This was a period of censorship, political persecution, imprisonment, torture and the disappearance of people who opposed the regime.

Yet there are still political figures who speak about that period with admiration and have even praised individuals associated with the torture carried out under the dictatorship.

I find that deeply disturbing.

How can we talk about democracy and freedom while celebrating a period when people were denied those very rights?

I am not suggesting that everyone who votes for a right-wing party shares these views. Of course they don't. People vote for different reasons and no political party should be beyond criticism.

But for me, this goes beyond disagreements about economic or social policies.

It is about democracy, human rights and the possibility of losing freedoms that previous generations fought hard to achieve.

Living outside Brazil doesn't mean I have stopped caring about what happens there. Sometimes the distance makes me feel even more helpless.

Voting is one of the ways I can still have a say in the future of my country. And although I live thousands of miles away, what happens in Brazil affects the people I love and inevitably, affects me too. And sharing that moment felt important to me.

I've shared posts supporting Pride, LGBTQ+ rights and opposing conversion therapy before. These are issues I care about both personally and professionally. I recognise that expressing support for a political candidate is different from supporting a particular cause. But our political choices are often influenced by our values and sometimes those values are reflected in what we choose to share publicly.

Authenticity comes with responsibility

I think this is the part that can sometimes get lost in discussions about therapists being authentic. Being genuine doesn't mean sharing everything.

As therapists, we have ethical responsibilities towards the people we work with. That includes being aware of our own beliefs and recognising how our words and actions might affect others.

But I don't believe being a therapist means we have to stay silent about the things that matter to us. We are still people who live in the world. We have families, relationships and experiences that matter to us. We are affected by political decisions and social changes just like everyone else.

And sometimes those things affect us deeply.

So, where do I stand?

I take my responsibilities as a therapist seriously and I know how important it is to be aware of my own beliefs and how they might influence my work.

But I'm also a person with my own experiences, opinions and things I care deeply about.

I don't expect everyone to see the world the way I do. And actually, one of the things I love about being a therapist is getting to know people whose lives and perspectives are so different from mine.

I suppose, for me, it's about finding that balance. Being true to who I am while remaining open and curious about who other people are.

---

Hello, I am Rose! A qualified Counsellor and Psychosexual Therapist working with individuals and couples. If you want to learn more about me and my work, have a look at my website. I would love to hear from you!